2 Corinthians 1:12

For our rejoicing is this, the testimony of our conscience, that in simplicity and godly sincerity, not with fleshly wisdom, but by the grace of God we have had our conduct in the world and more abundantly toward you... Not for that we have dominion over your faith, but are helpers for your joy, for by faith you stand. (2 Corinthians 1:12–24)

Paul defends himself not for his own sake but for the glory of God, appealing to a conscience purged by the blood of Christ.

God Loves an Imperfect Church

Over the past year and a half we have considered the church at Corinth, working through 1 Corinthians. As we begin 2 Corinthians, it is easy to see that the Corinthians were a tough group to pastor. Paul planted that church and sought to bring them to maturity, yet he met all kinds of difficulties there.

Be that as it may, Paul loved the church at Corinth, and that love was supernaturally induced. He did not manufacture it on his own. In 2 Corinthians 5:14 he says it is the love of Christ that compels him, that constrains and governs him. How many of you meet people regularly who are unlovely, difficult to like? In those times we need the love of Christ to constrain us to love them as God would.

The Corinthians accused Paul of many things — being greedy for money, weak as an apostle, fickle and flighty in his decisions. And yet he still loved them and longed for their maturity. When others might have thrown in the towel, Paul said in 2 Corinthians 12:15, "I will very gladly spend and be spent for you. Though the more abundantly I love you, the less I am loved." Even though they did not return his love, he would not give up on them. This reveals that God loves imperfect churches, because it was the love of God that compelled Paul. And that matters for us, because we too are an imperfect church that needs His grace, mercy, and love.

Paul Was Just Like Us

When you consider Paul's determination to bring this church to maturity, you might think of him as a super saint — and in the modern evangelical church we tend almost to deify the Apostle Paul, as if he were a special class of Christian none of us could be like. But the reality, emphasized throughout this letter, is that Paul was just like us. He struggled with trials, despaired, and hurt.

His determination did not come from amazing personal strength but from the recognition of his complete weakness. In 2 Corinthians 1:8 he writes that they were "pressed out of measure, above strength, in so much that we even despaired of life." Why? Verse 9: "that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God which raises the dead." God brought those troubles purposefully, so that in them Paul would see his weakness and find something great there.

In 2 Corinthians 3:5 he says, "not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think anything as being of ourselves, but our sufficiency is of God." I am convinced God wants to get every one of us to that bold confession — that I can do nothing apart from Him, agreeing with Jesus in John 15, "apart from me, you can do nothing." Yet most of us come into our Christian life thinking we can handle it. That is almost the American mindset: I'm my own self-made man. God has a way of bringing us down to our minimum so He can pour in the maximum, do great things through us, and receive the glory Himself.

Treasure in Earthen Vessels

In 2 Corinthians 4:7 Paul reaches this recognition: "But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God and not of us." God wants us to recognize that we truly are clay pots — dirt bags, formed from the dust of the earth. When God gets us to that place, then we have the greatest potential, because emptied of ourselves through trial He can pour into us this treasure so that people's confidence is in God and not in us.

How does God do this? Verse 8: "We are troubled on every side yet not distressed; we are perplexed but not in despair; persecuted but not forsaken; cast down but not destroyed." He allows us to be in places where it seems we are forsaken but are not, so the life of Christ is made manifest in us.

A Thorn in the Flesh

Paul received the message he preached by direct revelation of Jesus Christ — no Bible college, no apostle school. Could that not be a source of pride? As he interacted with Corinthians rejecting his apostleship, he could have said, "Don't you realize the risen Jesus met with me?"

In 2 Corinthians 12:7 he writes, "lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me." Who gave it to him? God. This is where some of our circuits break, because we struggle to comprehend that God would give a satanic messenger as a thorn. Commentators debate whether it was a physical infirmity or men who opposed his ministry; both can be supported. Whatever it was, it was God-ordained.

Paul besought the Lord three times to remove it — not a casual prayer but an impassioned pleading — and God said no. "My grace is sufficient for thee; my strength is made perfect in weakness." How many of you like when God says no? Yet notice Paul's response: "Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me... for when I am weak, then am I strong."

This sounds completely illogical. The only way anyone can say it is if they truly believe that on the other side of the suffering is incredible salvation and strength. To "boast in my infirmities" does not mean parading them before people — it means bringing them to God: "Lord, You know my trouble, I am weak, would You be strong?" The recognition of Paul's total weakness fueled his complete dependence on the Lord. True strength is found in full reliance upon God.

Paul wrote, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Philippians 4:13). He did not learn that on the mountaintop when everything was fine, but when he was weak and openly confessing he could not take another step unless God worked through him. As Philippians 2:13 says, "it is God who works in you to will and to do his good pleasure."

A Position Paul Did Not Like

As we come to 2 Corinthians 1:12, we find Paul in a position I don't think he liked, because here and in several other places in this letter he must defend himself before the Corinthians. How many of you enjoy defending yourself? We don't. He has to do it because of the allegations against him: that he was weak, that he lacked the authority of other apostles, that he was a hypocrite, greedy for money, and fickle in his decisions.

You might think it odd that Paul would even answer his critics. In the Psalms, David says, "God, You are my defense." Why write a thirteen-chapter letter defending himself when he knew he did no wrong? Because Paul, as an ambassador of Christ, was concerned that such assertions against his character might bring reproach on Christ. He did not want what he had done or left undone to tarnish the gospel of glory.

This is sobering, because we too are called ambassadors of Christ. At your job, at school, in the community, on the softball field, in the grocery store — people know you are a Christian, whether by the fish on your car, the Bible you carry, or seeing you drive to church. So the question presses: what does my life say about Jesus? I'm reminded of this often because of these cameras; people stop me in Home Depot and ask, "Have I seen you on TV?" People are watching.

The Testimony of a Clear Conscience

How would you defend yourself against false allegations? You might call witnesses — and Paul could have summoned Peter, James the brother of Jesus, Luke, Titus, Timothy, or Silas to vouch for him. He doesn't. He says, "our rejoicing is this, the testimony of our conscience." I have a clear conscience.

The Greeks and the Jews esteemed conscience highly because, as Paul writes in Romans, God has imprinted on every soul a measure of His moral law that excuses or accuses us. Your conscience is the nervous system of your soul. Just as your physical nervous system warns you through pain not to touch a hot stove, your conscience alerts you that you are headed toward danger when you begin to do something against what God has ordained. God's law is like an owner's manual showing the proper use of the equipment He gave us.

All humanity has this. If someone says they don't, the Bible reveals they have seared their conscience as with a hot iron — calloused it by repeatedly rejecting its warnings until they are past feeling. Meeting someone in that condition is frightful. For more on this, I highly recommend C.S. Lewis's Mere Christianity.

The Greeks so esteemed conscience they personified it as the goddess Nemesis, goddess of retribution, pictured with a sword in one hand and an hourglass in the other, waiting for the day to strike. A human court may wrongly acquit a guilty man, but he will never fool his conscience; alone, he knows, "I am the man." Paul speaks of conscience eighteen times in the New Testament — that it indicts or exonerates us, that a deacon must serve with a pure conscience (1 Timothy 3:9). Standing before the Jewish council in Acts 23:1, his first words were, "I have lived before God with a pure conscience" — and a chief priest struck him, refusing to believe it possible.

How the Conscience Is Purged

As Paul sat in prison shortly before his execution, his last letter told Timothy, "I thank God whom I serve from my forefathers with a pure conscience" (2 Timothy 1:3). This is the same Paul who persecuted the church and presided over Stephen's martyrdom. How could he say that?

The answer is in Hebrews. Unless we have seared it, all of us live under the rule of conscience, and because none of us live up to its standard we try to appease it religiously. Religion is largely man's attempt to appease his conscience, not God — even the atheist does good works to quiet the guilt. Our society tries to do away with guilt through alcohol, prescription drugs, and philanthropy. But there she stands with the sword and the hourglass.

Hebrews 9:14 asks, "how much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself without spot to God, purge your conscience from dead works to serve the living God?" There are two kinds of people serving God: one out of duty, trying to appease a guilty conscience; the other, like verse 14, serving with joy because the conscience has been purged. Hebrews 10:22 invites us: "Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience." Only the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus makes it possible to serve God with a pure conscience.

Simplicity and Godly Sincerity

So back to 2 Corinthians 1. Paul says in effect, "Say what you will, I stand before God with a pure conscience. I'm defending myself not for my sake but for God's." He lived "in simplicity and godly sincerity, not with fleshly wisdom, but by the grace of God."

Simplicity means singleness of heart — freedom from pretense and hypocrisy. Godly sincerity, in the Greek, means "judged by light," for God is light and in Him is no darkness. As 1 John 1:7 says, as we walk in the light we have fellowship and the blood of Christ cleanses us. The word sincere comes from the Latin for "without wax." In the ancient marketplace, an unethical merchant would fill cracks in a fired clay pot with wax and hide it in the back, while the truly good vessels were displayed in the light to be examined. In Christ, He exposes all our cracks and deals with them so we no longer have a vile conscience.

In verse 13 Paul adds, "we write no other things unto you than what you read or acknowledge." When he writes, there is no ambiguity. If he exposes sin, he speaks clearly; if he encourages, he encourages plainly. They had accused him of being double-minded, saying one thing and meaning another, but he insists there is no veiled or hidden truth in his words.

"Did I Use Lightness?"

In verses 15–17 Paul amplifies this. At the end of 1 Corinthians 16 he had planned to stay in Ephesus, then visit Corinth, go to Macedonia, return to them, and head to Judea. Now he writes from Macedonia, having not yet visited Corinth. So some in Corinth said, "We thought you were a man of your word. Your yes means no — you're fickle, governed by your flesh, not led by the Lord." Paul asks, "Did I use lightness?" — was I fickle? Did I purpose according to the flesh?

Why does this matter so much to him? Because he is an ambassador of Christ, and he fears that people will project his perceived fickleness onto God. Verse 18: "But as God is true, our word toward you was not yea and nay." When God says He will do something, He does it. Jesus said in Matthew 5:37, "Let your communication be yea, yea; nay, nay," and James restates it in James 5:12 — let your yes be yes and your no, no. Paul wants to make sure his life projects rightly upon the Lord.

This brings a sober question home: what does our life say to our spouse, our children, our coworkers about who God is? Many struggle with God as Father because their earthly father was a terrible example. Many are uninterested in Christ because of the Christians they've met. How are we ambassadoring?

All the Promises Are Yes and Amen

Verse 20: "For all the promises of God in him are yea, and in him Amen, unto the glory of God by us." Underline "in him." At the core of this discussion is the glory of God, not the reputation of Paul. He fears false accusation might diminish God's glory. When God promises something, He brings it to pass, because He is the God of His word.

God proved this through giving His Son. Verse 21: "Now he which establisheth us with you in Christ, and hath anointed us, is God." The greatest demonstration of God's faithfulness is the cross. Over three hundred Old Testament prophecies foretold the suffering Servant who would die for our sins, and God brought every one to pass. As Romans 8:32 says, "He that spared not his own Son... how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?" If God gave His only Son, will His other promises not come to pass as well?

He has given us something more, verse 22: He "hath also sealed us, and given the earnest of the Spirit in our hearts." The word earnest — or guarantee — means a down payment; think layaway. God has redeemed us, but we are not yet in His presence, so He has given a down payment of assurance, His Holy Spirit, that we will be with Him. Our greatest inheritance is not merely paradise but God Himself. Ephesians 1:13–14 says we were "sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise, which is the guarantee of our inheritance."

Helpers of Your Joy

In verse 23 Paul says, "I call God for a record upon my soul, that to spare you I came not as yet unto Corinth." The New Living Translation amplifies it: "The reason I didn't return to Corinth was to spare you from a severe rebuke." If he had come, heads would have rolled. He stayed away not because he was fickle, but to spare them. The Corinthians had assumed selfish or cowardly motives; Paul sets them straight.

Verse 24: "Not for that we have dominion over your faith, but are helpers of your joy: for by faith ye stand." He recognized that as a leader he was not a lord over them — Jesus is the only Lord, as Ephesians 4 tells us. Instead, leaders are workers together with God's people for their joy. His hard letters addressing sin were written so that they would stand strong in faith and be filled with joy. That is the aim of leadership in the body of Christ — not to lord authority over people, but that we would be the most joy-filled people in all of San Diego County, and that people would see God in us.

It is a sobering thought as we go: what does my life say about Jesus Christ? What do people know about Him, having never read the Bible, when they read you as a living Bible? We are ambassadors of Christ in this world, sent to connect people with Jesus.

Closing Prayer

Father, we thank You for Your word. Lord, I pray that You would cement these things in our hearts as we prepare to go from here. Lord, help us to grow in grace and in our knowledge of You. Work these things out in our lives this week, we pray. We ask in Jesus' name. Amen.