1 Timothy 4:9

This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance, for to this end we both labor and suffer reproach, because we trust in the living God, who is the Savior of all men, especially of those who believe. These things command and teach. Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word and conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity. Till I come, give attention to reading, to exhortation, to doctrine. Do not neglect the gift that is in you, which was given to you by prophecy with the laying on of hands of the eldership. Meditate on these things. Give yourself entirely to them, that your progress may be evident to all. Take heed to yourself and to the doctrine. Continue in them, for in doing this you will save both yourself and those who hear you. (1 Timothy 4:9–16)

Your life is teaching someone how to walk with Christ—so labor by grace to make it a good example.

The Value of a Good Example

I was about ten or eleven years old when a new kid moved into the neighborhood, and instantly there was a disturbance in the force. I was a big, tall kid, but this new kid was a bit of a bully, and suddenly I was the fourth man out. My older brother Alan, eight years older than me, watched the whole thing and didn't like what he saw. He pulled me aside and spent twenty or thirty minutes teaching me how to fight—"You don't let people push you around." That's just the way Alan is.

That very same night, around two in the morning, Alan woke me up. "Miles, you remember that stuff I told you about fighting this morning? Forget all of it. Get up, I need you to help me." He dragged me into the bathroom to hold a flashlight on his bloodied, bruised face while he stitched his own eye up with a needle-nose pliers. I'm not kidding. As he sewed, he told me, "Don't get in fights. Forget what I told you this morning."

I'll let you decide whether Alan was a good example in that situation. But it really is important to have good examples in life.

Timothy's Challenge of Youth

Paul left Timothy in the great city of Ephesus to pastor a church that was off course. It was a task easily stated but hard to accomplish, and among the many hardships Timothy faced, one significant challenge was his youth. When we hear "youth," we picture a teenager, but Timothy was well beyond that—probably in his late twenties or early thirties. He had been a teenager when he first met Paul, and had now spent about fourteen years with him. But in first-century Asia Minor, age was a vital factor in leadership, so being in his early thirties would actually be a hindrance.

I've thought a lot about this lately. Some of you think I'm still young—and I appreciate that—but I'm not as young as I was when I started in ministry. About eight months ago, my friend Pastor David Guzik casually looked over and said, "You do realize you're not one of those young pastors anymore." This last fall semester at the Bible College, it hit me that I'm technically old enough to be the dad of the first-semester students. It was shocking enough to occupy my thoughts the rest of the day.

I first began pastoring at twenty-eight, started teaching the Bible and leading a youth ministry at nineteen, and did my first funeral at twenty-one—a couple who had delivered a stillborn baby. Stepping into that brings a lot of nerves. People ask, "So you've done a lot of these?" and you don't want to say it's your first. I kept coming back to 1 Timothy 4:12, and I still think on these verses today.

Words Worthy of Our Trust

Even though you may never lead or pastor a group, and even though you may not count yourself as young, these words still have great application no matter your age or stage of life. Paul says, "This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance." These words are worthy of our trust, our acceptance, our consideration, and our application, whether we are early in our walk or have walked with the Lord a long time.

Timothy had a wonderful example in Paul. It was through Paul's church-planting and pastoring that Timothy, his mother, and his grandmother became Christians. When Timothy was somewhere between fourteen and eighteen, Paul invited him to come along, and for the next decade and a half Timothy observed Paul's pattern of life—how he planted churches, pastored people, wrote, and preached. But now Timothy was left in Ephesus to be the example himself.

You Are an Example to Someone

Point number one: you are an example to someone at every stage of your faith, whether you like it or not. If you're a follower of Jesus today, people are watching you—friends, family, neighbors, coworkers, especially your spouse and children. They're watching to see what it really means to be a disciple. They notice if you have a church sticker on your car, if you get up early on Sunday, if you carry a Bible, if you read it. People keep tabs on us.

That's why Paul reminds Timothy in verse 10:

For bodily exercise profits little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life that now is and of that which is to come. This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance.

If you trust in the living God, if He is your Savior, you must labor in the exercise of godliness, because people are watching to see how this Jesus-follower thing actually works out. That's why Paul told the Philippians to "work out your salvation." God has saved us, given us a new heart, and made us new creations; we work that out so people can see the transformation.

Jesus said it this way:

You are the salt of the earth... You are the light of the world, a city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden... Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven. (Matthew 5:13–16)

Because we trust in the living God, we must labor and strive so that what is internal becomes external, that people would see our good works and glorify our Father. Light is powerful. A couple of years ago my dad and I made a frivolous purchase—a laser cutter we backed in a crowdfunding campaign. I had laser envy. We plopped down $2,500, and it just came this last week. I've been cutting things with lasers all week. We don't need it, but it's a reminder of how powerful light is, and how Jesus wants us to shine brightly. This world is in darkness, and we are the canvas on which God desires to show forth His glory.

Give No One Grounds to Despise the Faith

Paul says, "Let no one despise your youth." The NIV translates it, "Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young." One commentator said, "Give no one any ground by any fault of character for despising your youth." I'd adjust it for us today: give no one any ground by any fault of character to despise or disdain your faith. How is our life instructing others about Christ? We should endeavor to live an irreproachable life that is worthy of imitation, giving no one any opportunity to justly criticize the church, Christ, or Christians.

This isn't easy, especially in a culture increasingly hostile to people of faith. It may be a small but very vocal minority, but we should endeavor to live in a way that exalts the glory of Christ. Sadly, throughout church history, Christians and churches have often negatively affected people's perception of God. We should aim to live irreproachable lives worthy of imitation.

An Example to and of the Believer

Paul says, "Be an example to the believers." The King James says "an example of the believer," while the New King James and others say "to the believer." Should it mean being an example of God's followers to a world that doesn't follow God, or an example to believers? Both are equally good and important. We should be an example to Christians and to those who are not yet Christians.

I love Paul's words in 1 Corinthians 11:1: "Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ." That's both an encouragement and a challenge. I long to say that with total sincerity. Paul wasn't being arrogant—he was a sinner like the rest of us—but he was genuinely endeavoring to imitate God as a dear child. What a blessing to be able to say with sincerity, "You can follow my example."

Six Marks of an Exemplary Life

Paul names six areas: word, conduct, love, spirit, faith, and purity.

In word. This means being an example in our speech and in our use of the word of God. As Paul says in Ephesians 4:29, "Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth." The New Living Translation puts it simply: "Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement." That old saying—"sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me"—is absurd. I've long forgotten the sticks and stones, but I still remember painful words from childhood.

We should also be exemplary in our knowledge and use of God's word. When I was twenty-three, I took a class on biblical counseling. About two-thirds of the way through, a man more than twenty years older than me said, "Miles, one thing I appreciate is that you always follow up whatever you say with the word of God." That wasn't intentional—it was simply that, having spent time in the Scriptures, the word was in me and it came out. That should be the case for all of us. I think of Mike Phillips, who nearly every time I talk with him has Scripture to share. We should be like that.

In conduct. Peter uses this same word: "As He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct" (1 Peter 1:15). Not just on Sunday morning, but at all times. None of us will be perfectly holy in this life because of our fallen nature, but it should be our aim. We might only hit it five percent of the time, but it is the goal. And when we fail, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous, our intercessor and mediator who gives us great forgiveness. Peter adds, "Having your conduct honorable among the Gentiles" (1 Peter 2:11–12). Even in a culture that reproaches us, people should still see honesty, integrity, self-control, mercy, grace, and love in us.

Point number three: we aren't saved by our good conduct, but we are certainly saved for good conduct. As Paul says in Ephesians 2:8–10, "For by grace are you saved through faith... not of works, lest anyone should boast. For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works."

In love. Jesus said, "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another as I have loved you... By this all will know that you are My disciples" (John 13:34–35). Let's be honest: over the last fifteen or twenty years, the church in America has not been known by its love. That is unfortunate, and we need to work to resolve it. How did Jesus love us? He laid down His life. In what ways are we sacrificially laying down our lives for others?

In spirit. In verse 14, Paul tells Timothy, "Do not neglect the gift that is in you." When God saved you, He came into your life by His Holy Spirit and gave you spiritual gifts. Did you know you have spiritual gifts? We should seek to exercise them, not neglect them. Even more importantly, we should be exemplary in the fruit of the Spirit—love, joy, peace, kindness, gentleness, self-control—walking in the Spirit and not fulfilling the lusts of our fallen nature.

In faith. We must exercise ourselves so that we are exemplary in our trust in God and our faithfulness to Him. The more we walk with Jesus, the more implicitly we should trust Him—with our finances, our children, our future, everything. And we should be faithful to Him in obedience, in prayer, and in the Scriptures.

In purity. This word means to be unmixed and unalloyed, purged of all dross. Like a great chunk of gold filled with impurities that must be refined, our lives are to be purged. Paul says in Ephesians 5:3–6, "Fornication and all uncleanness and covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints... neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor coarse jesting... Therefore do not be partakers with them." When we come to Christ we are filled with impurities, but through the sanctifying process—His grace, His word, His Spirit, and our seeking to obey—He purges them out and transforms us more and more into His likeness.

How We Grow to Be Exemplary

Point number four: by God's grace, we should labor to be exemplary. But how? Paul says in verses 13–15: "Till I come, give attention to reading, to exhortation, to doctrine... Meditate on these things. Give yourself entirely to them, that your progress may be evident to all."

That's what we do when we gather on a Sunday morning. We open the Scriptures, read them, and from that passage give exhortation and doctrine. We allow the Scriptures to inform our understanding of what is true and right, and we seek by God's grace to work those things out. Timothy was told not to neglect his gift but to meditate on these things and give himself entirely to them—not partly.

Forty minutes on a Sunday is not enough. (Don't worry, that doesn't mean we're going to start doing ninety-minute services.) On your own, tomorrow and Tuesday, you should be spending time reading the word, letting its doctrine exhort and challenge you, giving yourself entirely to it so that your progress is evident to all. People will begin to see that the "you" that was you is no longer the "you" that is you. John says some of the people you used to run with will think it strange that you don't run with them anymore—and that's wonderful. Exemplary lives are the product of a careful, thoughtful acting-out of the things we attentively read and are exhorted to do from the doctrines of Scripture.

Your Life Is Teaching Someone

Paul concludes, "Take heed to yourself and to the doctrine. Continue in them, for in doing this you will save both yourself and those who hear you" (1 Timothy 4:16). The New Living Translation says, "Keep a close watch on how you live." That's a good exhortation, because much of our lives is lived on autopilot. Think about how often you drive from work to home and arrive remembering nothing of the last twenty minutes. People worry about self-driving cars—most cars on the freeway are already driving themselves.

Point number five: remember your life is teaching others how to live and walk with Christ. This is a sobering reality. After almost twenty years of teaching the Bible, I'm convinced that more has been taught—for good or for bad—by my life than by my words. There are people watching you who may never come to this building: in your neighborhood, your home, at work, at school, in the community. Your life is teaching someone.

It is my hope and desire for myself and for this church that our lives would be exemplary—an example to Christians and non-Christians in the word, in love, in faith, in the Spirit, in all these things—so that people would see Christ's saving power working out in us. For that to take place, we at least need to be aware that our lives are teaching something. And with that sobering reality, we need to pray and ask God to help us.

Closing Prayer

Father, I thank You for the promise of the Scriptures—that though we can do nothing in and of ourselves, we can do all things through You who gives us strength. Lord, I am not sufficient of myself to think anything as being of myself, but my sufficiency is from You, and it is You who enables me to be a good servant of the gospel. We admit our inability apart from Your strength and power at work in us to work these things out. But in admitting that inability, we pray that You would work in us both to will and to do Your good pleasure this week. By Your Spirit, enable us to walk these things out—and quicken us to remember to walk them out. When we are frustrated, tempted to be impatient, upset, or irritable, by the quickening grace of Your Holy Spirit remind us to walk in humility, patience, goodness, and self-control. Give us Your patience and Your self-control, so that the people who know us would see You at work in us and have to admit that it is not us, but Christ in us. God, do that work in us, we pray. We ask this in Jesus' name. Amen.