The Practical Side of Love

Owe no one anything except to love one another. For he who loves another has fulfilled the law... Love does no harm to a neighbor. Therefore Love is the fulfillment of the law. And do this, knowing the time, that now it is high time to wake out of sleep... The night is far spent, the day is at hand, therefore let us cast off the works of darkness, and let us put on the armor of light. Let us walk properly as in the day... But put on the Lord Jesus Christ and make no provision for the flesh to fulfill its lusts.

The one debt we can never finish paying is the command to love—and we can only pay it by the power of God's Spirit.

A Debt We Cannot Pay

Have you ever had a debt that you could not repay? We live in a nation where that's all too normal. Look at our own national debt, climbing past sixteen trillion dollars—a number so large we can't even cognate it.

A couple of weeks ago, in Romans 13:7, Paul said we are to render to all what is due them: taxes to whom taxes are due, customs to whom customs, fear to whom fear, honor to whom honor. Carrying that same thought forward, Paul opens verse 8: "Owe no one anything."

Some have taken this verse to mean we should never borrow or take out a loan, and there is much discussion about that. But this text is not necessarily saying that. Rather, it is saying we are never to be unfaithful debtors. We must responsibly render whatever is required to whomever it is required.

Then Paul adds, "except to love one another." There is a recognition here of a debt we can never finish paying—the debt of love. Having freely received the love of God, we are to freely give it out. We remain in debt to keep this commandment.

A Command Without Condition

The command to love one another, found here and throughout Scripture, has no precondition and is to be executed without partiality. Even those who don't read Scripture, don't go to church, or don't believe Jesus is the Son of God will sometimes point to this command and say, "This is a good one." Sometimes unbelievers hold it up to Christians: "Don't you know the Bible commands you to love me?" To that we should rightly say, "Yes! Amen. And the Bible says a lot of other things I'd like to talk with you about."

But to love with unconditioned impartiality is utterly impossible in our own strength. The law of God is impossible for us to fulfill on our own, and this command to love is no exception. We need enabling power from God. Yet even though we lack the ability, the command still stands.

Scripture commands us to love God with all our being (Deuteronomy 6:4–5) and to love our neighbor (Leviticus 19:18). Husbands are commanded to love their wives (Ephesians 5); wives are commanded, through Titus 2, to love their husbands. John tells us to love the brethren (1 John 4:21). And Jesus, in John 13:34 and 15:12, says, "Love one another as I have loved you." The command to love is not new; the command to love as Jesus loved is new. That means at least two things: we are to love sacrificially, and we are to love as Jesus commanded and exemplified—even loving our enemies. In Matthew 5:44 He said, "You have heard... love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I tell you, love your enemies."

All of this—loving God above all, our neighbor, our spouse, the brethren, loving sacrificially, loving our enemies—we cannot fulfill in our own strength. It's not a bad thing to aim at, but it is something we fall far short of.

What Love Is Not

Our culture constantly feeds us its own idea of love, presented in books, movies, and TV shows. In that landscape, love seems to follow emotional leading, filled with warm and fuzzy feelings. There is much misunderstanding about what love genuinely is. So we need to ask: what exactly does this command mean?

Let me begin with what the command to love is not. First, it is not a command to have strong feelings of affection or stirring emotions about someone—though that's what our culture reduces love to. If love is just feelings, then when those feelings fade after marriage—when you realize the other person doesn't clean up after themselves—you've "fallen out of love," and culture says you should quit and depart. But Scripture's command to love is not a command to have those feelings.

Second, it is not a command by which we pretend to enjoy the presence of people we don't particularly like. Let's be honest—there are some people we don't care for, and that person might even occupy the same row as you here today. To love is not to feign acceptance.

Third, it is not a command to never feel anger toward the practice of evil. Jesus is the personification of love—"God is love"—and yet both in Jesus on earth and in God throughout Scripture, there are things God is angry at.

Fourth, it is not a command to never punish transgression or discipline disobedience. Some in our culture say overlooking trespass and refusing to discipline—especially for parents—is the loving thing. The reality is the inverse. Hebrews 12 makes it clear: "Whom the Lord loves He chastens, and scourges every child whom He receives. If you are without discipline, you are not a child." No one likes chastening, but the one who does not discipline does not love. So love is not a command to overlook wickedness, even when family members tell us, "You just need to accept me the way I am if you love me."

What Love Is

What, then, is the command to love? It is a command to demonstrate sincere kindness and tenderhearted affection toward others in our actions. Our actions toward others should be dominated by kindness and tenderhearted affection.

Second, it is a command to do no harm to another individual. Third, it is a command to hold no malice toward another. You may never strike out physically—maybe because you'd come out the worse for it—yet in your heart you wish another's demise while pretending to enjoy their company. That's malice, and love holds none of it.

Fourth, it is a command to not murder, slander, steal from, covet after, or lie to—but instead to be faithful toward and honest with another, even when it is difficult. This is what we glean as we break down the concept of loving one another, because love fulfills the whole of the law.

Love Fulfills the Law

In Romans 13:9 Paul lists five of the Ten Commandments: "You shall not commit adultery. You shall not murder. You shall not steal. You shall not bear false witness. You shall not covet." Then he adds, "and if there is any other commandment." There are more than five—God gave ten in Exodus, and Jewish rabbis count 613 commandments throughout the Pentateuch. You can search "613 Jewish commandments" online and read the whole list. And when you read them, you find we don't keep them; we're guilty.

But even those 613 don't fully represent the nature of God, of which the law is a representation. There's far more that could be called law. Yet because God is gracious and wants us to pass the test, He sums it up in one bite-sized chunk: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself."

Notice the five commandments Paul lists all relate to our interaction with other people—not stealing, not murdering, not slandering. Paul is writing to Christians already brought into right relationship with God in Christ Jesus. The question now is: how are we to be in right relationship with one another? The answer: "love your neighbor as yourself."

A week ago my wife and I were sitting in the car with all four kids in the Vons parking lot while she ran in. A Christian radio station was playing, and a song came on with the line, "You've got to learn to love yourself before you can love another." I thought, "What? That's not in the Bible." The reality is every one of us already inordinately loves ourselves. We need to learn to divert that love toward our neighbor.

The Greatest Commandments

These powerful words did not originate with Paul. They were well known among the Jews of Jesus's day, and they originated with God. In Matthew 22, a lawyer tested Jesus: "What is the greatest commandment in the law?" Jesus answered, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: you shall love your neighbor as yourself." Then He added, "On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets." In Galatians, Paul goes a step further, summing up the entire law in one word: love.

Every Jewish child, from the giving of the law until now, was taught the Shema from Deuteronomy 6:4–5: "Hear, O Israel, the Lord our God is one Lord, and you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and strength." It was recited in every synagogue then, and still is today. Young Saul of Tarsus, who would become Paul, knew those words. And together with Leviticus 19, it was commonly held that these were the greatest commandments.

Who Is My Neighbor?

In Luke 10, another lawyer stood up and tested Jesus: "Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?" Jesus replied, "What is written in the law? What is your reading of it?" The lawyer answered correctly: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart... and your neighbor as yourself." Jesus said, "You have answered rightly. Do this and live." How many recognize that it's one thing to know and a completely different thing to do?

But the lawyer, "wanting to justify himself"—to make himself righteous—asked, "And who is my neighbor?" That was the great debate in Jesus's day. Different schools of thought had different criteria, all designed to reduce the command down so you could gather your neighbors into a small bubble and hate everyone else. Because our fallen nature is to hate.

Jesus answered with a story. A man traveling from Jerusalem to Jericho fell among thieves who stripped him, wounded him, and left him half dead. A priest came down that road, saw him, and passed by on the other side. Then a Levite—the priestly tribe, though many served as judges and civil servants, something of a politician—came, looked closely, and also passed by on the other side.

But a Samaritan came along. The Samaritans were considered racially different and were despised; the Jews even used "Samaritan" as a curse word and hurled it at Jesus to belittle Him. Yet this Samaritan, when he saw the wounded Jewish man, had merciful compassion. He bandaged his wounds, poured on oil and wine, set him on his own animal, brought him to an inn, paid two denarii—two days' wages—and promised to repay whatever more was needed.

Then Jesus asked, "Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to him who fell among thieves?" The lawyer answered, "He who showed mercy on him." Jesus said, "Go and do likewise." A neighbor is not identified by a litmus test that lets us love a small circle and dismiss everyone else.

Love Does No Harm

Romans 13:10 says, "Love does no harm to a neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law." That word "harm" is elsewhere translated "evil," connecting us back to Romans 12:9: "Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil." Love does no evil to a neighbor.

The idea is clear. You cannot fulfill the command of Ephesians 5 to walk in love while also harboring wickedness. These cannot coexist. You cannot walk in love and at the same time harbor bitterness, malice, anger, and ill will toward another person. Love fulfills what is righteous.

Since love fulfills the law, if our aim is obedience to God, we must aim at loving one another—and to do so we must love as Jesus did. "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another as I have loved you" (John 13:34; 15:12). His love is the standard. In that same passage He says, "Greater love has no one than this, but that a man would lay down his life for his friends." That is the greatest expression of human love. But God's love supersedes it: "God demonstrates His love toward us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8)—loving us while we were His enemies.

Insufficient Funds—and God's Supply

This debt we are called to pay, we cannot fulfill. We have insufficient funds; we are lacking in this area of love. So what do we do?

Turn to 2 Kings 4. A widow, the wife of one of the sons of the prophets, cried out to Elisha: "Your servant my husband is dead... and the creditor is coming to take away my two sons to be his slaves." Solomon said, "The borrower is slave to the lender," and in that day it was literal—an unpaid debt could make you the creditor's servant. The debt was too great for her to pay.

Elisha asked, "What shall I do for you? What do you have in the house?" His words admit he had no power in himself to fix it. She had nothing but one jar of oil. Elisha told her to borrow as many empty vessels as she could, shut the door, and pour. She poured, and the oil kept flowing until every vessel was full—then it stopped. Elisha said, "Go, sell the oil, pay your debt, and live on the rest."

She could not, in herself, provide what was needed. But God miraculously enabled her to pay the debt. The same is true for us. We cannot fulfill the debt to love one another—we don't have enough oil to go around. Yet God, by His indwelling Spirit and power, enables us to do what we cannot do. What is the fruit of the Spirit? Love—and from that joy, peace, gentleness, kindness, self-control. The evidence of God's presence in us is love.

And Do This—Knowing the Time

Verse 11 says, "And do this." Underline those words. Many teachers handle verses 11–14 apart from verses 8–10, missing the connection. But what are we to "do"? Love one another. Why should we?

First, because it fulfills the law. Second, because it honors and glorifies God. Third, because it is a witness of Him—Jesus said in John 13:34–35, "By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, by the love that you have one for another." Fourth, because our time is short. "Do this, knowing the time, that it is high time to wake out of sleep. For now our salvation is nearer than when we first believed." We are one step closer to our salvation than we were yesterday.

We need to know the time and observe what is happening in the world. Solomon, in Ecclesiastes 3, said, "To everything there is a season." Jesus, in Matthew 16, said you know how to discern the weather—then also discern the times in which you live. Moses prayed in Psalm 90, "So teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." And in 1 Chronicles 12, the tribe of Issachar "understood the times" and "knew what Israel should do." We too need to observe the times and respond accordingly.

Cast Off Darkness, Put On Light

"The night is far spent, the day is at hand. Therefore let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light." When Paul says things like that, it sounds wonderful and almost like Lord of the Rings—but what does he mean? Verse 13 explains: "Let us walk properly, as in the day, not in revelry and drunkenness, not in lewdness and lust, not in strife and envy."

These words describe the first-century Roman world—and the twenty-first-century Western world. The Roman world revolved around worship of deities like Apollo, Diana, Hermes, and Bacchus. To worship Bacchus, people would gather at his temple, get smashed drunk, and parade through the city in a massive drunken procession. We say we don't do anything like that anymore—but when the Lakers win the championship at Staples Center, out pour the crowds in a drunken party, turning over cars. That's the worship of Bacchus, just in purple and gold—the colors of royalty. The temple just has a corporate name on it now.

So walking properly does not look like that. Not in revelry or drunkenness—and Scripture is clear that drinking alcohol is not a sin, but drunkenness is. Not in lewdness, which means adulterous immorality—people worshiped Diana, whose great temple was in Ephesus, by engaging with temple prostitutes. Not in lust, meaning promiscuous wantonness, always searching for the next opportunity. And not in strife or envy—contentious battling, divisions, fightings, and jealousy.

Instead, verse 14: "Put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh to fulfill its lusts." Our flesh longs for the things of this world; we are told to make no provision for it. This brings us back to where this whole section began, Romans 12:1–2: "Present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God... And do not be conformed to this world." Do not walk in conformity with what a fallen world calls normal. Instead, put on Christ.

Closing Prayer

We live in a time when the love of many is growing cold, just as Jesus predicted in the Olivet Discourse. But the life of the follower of Jesus should be dominated by something different—by the fruit of the Spirit, chiefly love. And we confess, like the widow in 2 Kings 4, that we don't have the ability to pay this debt. God says, "I have enough love to overflow," for He has "shed His love abroad in our hearts by the Spirit of God" (Romans 5). So let us pray:

"Father, I confess that I am unloving. I confess that I am unlovable. I ask that You would enable me, by Your power and Your Spirit, to love as You loved—that the fruit of Your presence would be evident in my life, that those I know who don't know You would see Your love in me, that they would desire to know You. Enable me to walk as You walked, to love as You love. I can't do it on my own. In Jesus' name. Amen."