1 Corinthians 7:1

Now concerning the things whereof you wrote unto me, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence, and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife has not power of her own body, but the husband. And likewise, also the husband has not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one another, except it be with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to prayer, and come together again that Satan tempt you not towards immorality.

But I speak this by permission and not of commandment, for I would that all men were even as I myself. However, every man has his gift, his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and one after another.

Father, we ask that You'd give us wisdom as we look into Your Word. Guide us into all truth, teach us all things, and make us wise in the way of holiness and sanctification. Lord, that we would be honoring to You, glorifying to You, and a light in a dark world. We ask, Lord, that this morning You would continue to transform us by the renewing of our minds, for we ask it in Jesus' name. And all God's people agreed, saying, Amen. You can be seated.

In the first six chapters of the book of 1 Corinthians, Paul confronted the issues of carnality within the Corinthian church. As we come to chapter 7, Paul now shifts focus and begins to address specific questions that they had asked him in a letter they had sent to him. In chapter 7, he deals with issues regarding marriage, questions that they had about marriage. Then in chapters 8 through 10, he addresses Christian liberty. Chapter 11 focuses on church conduct.

Through chapters 12 to 16, Paul addresses various topics, including spiritual gifts, the resurrection, and giving and offering. As we come to chapter 7, we may be in this chapter for at least a couple of weeks. This morning, we will only cover the first seven verses. It is no wonder that Paul first addresses a question surrounding marriage and intimacy, especially since he dealt with the issue of sexual immorality in the previous chapters, specifically chapters 5 and 6.

In chapter 5, Paul confronted a man in Corinth who was living in an immoral relationship with his stepmother, a situation that was not even named among the Gentiles. Paul had to address this immorality directly. Then, in chapter 6, we saw how the Corinthians had taken Paul's teaching about liberty and misapplied it in an immoral way. They used it not for liberty but for license. Paul had clearly taught them, as he did others, like the church at Galatia, that while all things are lawful, they misinterpreted this to justify any behavior. Paul makes it clear in chapter 6 that this is not the case, as he emphatically declares in verse 18 to flee sexual immorality.

If it is true, as we discussed last week, that God has given man certain appetites and desires—such as the stomach for food—then it follows that we ought to eat. The Greeks reasoned that since God has given us a body, we have the ability to engage in sexual relations, and therefore, that is what God created us for. However, that is not what Paul teaches. He states that although we have the appetite for sexual relations and the instruments to engage in them, that is not our primary purpose. We were created, first and foremost, to glorify God and to bring pleasure to Him.

Our primary purpose, as we saw last week, is not immorality. Therefore, since our primary purpose is to glorify God with our bodies and spirits, as indicated in the very last verse of chapter 6, we ought to do so because we are doubly His. We are first His because God created us, and we are second His because, as Christians, He has redeemed us. Having received that redemption, we should use this life and this body that God has given us for His glory.

This raises the question: Why did God create us with such desires? Does He intend for us to deny them? Does He not give us an opportunity to understand their purpose?

Opportunity to satisfy those appetites? Certainly, He does. As we come to chapter 7, we see that the satisfaction of those appetites for physical intimacy is granted to us in that ultimate intimate union that is marriage. This chapter follows the teaching in chapter 6 about fleeing sexual immorality, and we must remember this context as we study through this passage.

The biblical establishment of marriage is very clear. God is the one who ordained and created marriage. Genesis chapter 2, verse 18 tells us that God looked at His creation, including man, and said, "It is not good that man should be alone." So, God fashioned woman, Eve, and brought her to man. Therefore, God says in Genesis chapter 2, verse 24, "A man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." This is God's founding of marriage; He is the creator of it.

In a day and age where we are trying to define what marriage is, we should consider what the Creator of marriage has to say about it. He made them male and female. Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. That is the teaching of the Scriptures; that is how God ordained marriage. Any other definition that changes that is not marriage. It's something else, but it's not marriage.

Of course, God further instructed His people in the law, in the first five books of the Bible, about marriage and restrictions upon marriage. Paul was an expert in the law. However, when the Apostle Paul entered into a non-Hebrew, predominantly Gentile world filled with very pagan Greco-Roman ideas and values, he must have been taken aback by what he saw in places like Athens and Corinth.

The city of Corinth, along with many of those Greco-Roman cities at the time, had a very confused understanding of marriage. There were at least four different types of marriage among the Romans. One of them, which was really only for the noble, the upper class, and the elite, was similar to our idea of traditional marriage, where vows were given and there was an exchanging of rings, even in ancient times among the Romans.

Marriage in ancient Rome was viewed quite differently than it is today. Every Roman man was expected not only to have a wife for procreation but also a mistress for recreation. Thus, traditional marriage coexisted with what was known as slave marriage, as over 60% of the population of the Roman Empire were slaves. If a slave owner had a male servant and a female servant who wished to have a relationship, they could officially live together as long as the owner ordained it. This arrangement was considered a slave's marriage; however, the master retained control over his slaves and could sell one of them off or separate them if he chose to.

Many individuals in the early church within the Roman Empire were slaves and had this kind of status regarding marriage. In contrast, the Hebrews had a well-established understanding of marriage, grounded in the law and God's word. The Romans had various forms of marriage, including traditional marriage, slave marriage, and what we would today call common law marriage. In common law marriage, if a male and female began to cohabitate, they were viewed as married by society after a year of living together.

Another form of marriage prevalent at that time was arranged marriage, where a father would essentially sell his daughter to the highest bidder, making her the wife of that individual. In this culture, women were often regarded as property and had far fewer rights than men. They did not hold the same value as men in that society. While the Bible does not endorse this view, it does report that it was the reality of the time.

The Corinthians were particularly confused about marriage, and divorce was a significant issue. William Barclay, a noted commentator, referenced a historical document describing a woman who was marrying for the 27th time to a man who would be his 26th wife. It had reached a point where people counted their lives not by years but by the number of marriages they had experienced. This perspective on marriage and divorce was quite different from what we might consider liberal today.

As we discussed last week, the Greeks and the Romans viewed man as a dichotomy, consisting of both body and soul. They believed that the body and the soul were distinct parts of a person.

The soul and body were viewed as completely separate by some. They believed that the body could be treated however one wished without affecting the soul in any way. This led to a mindset of living it up and enjoying life without denying any fleshly appetites. Among the Romans, there was a group that embraced this perspective, asserting that since the body and soul are different, one should simply enjoy life.

However, there was another, smaller group that held a contrasting view. They believed that the soul is divine while the body is evil, leading them to conclude that anything done with the body is inherently evil. This group practiced what we would call asceticism, completely denying the body. One of the first heresies to enter the church, particularly in the second century AD, was Gnosticism. Even at the time when Paul wrote his letter to the Corinthians, we can see the roots of Gnosticism present, with its belief that the body is evil and that one should deny all fleshly or physical desires.

It appears that some within the church at Corinth were asserting that the most godly thing to do was to remain single. They suggested that if one was married, they should separate and stay single to honor God. Paul needed to address this confusion. The society in Corinth was indeed perplexed about marriage, a situation that may sound familiar today. They began to claim that singleness was the best and most God-honoring choice.

We must remember that God established the home and marriage before He established the church, and He has specific things to say about this. In the first seven verses of 1 Corinthians 7, Paul begins to discuss the issue of celibacy. If you're taking notes, in verse 1, he speaks about its goodness. He states, "Now concerning the things whereof you wrote unto me," addressing their letter, "it is good for a man not to touch a woman."

It is important to understand that this statement should not be taken literally. It does not mean that if men are sitting a little too close to women who are not their wives, they should space out the chairs. It does not imply that one should never pat a woman on the back or give a sister a hug. The phrase "it is good for a man not to touch a woman" was a Jewish euphemism that referred to marriage. It spoke of physical union and physical pleasure within the context of marriage.

It is good for a man not to engage in those things. The NIV version also translates it correctly when it says it is good for a man not to marry. So, is Paul endorsing that we ought not to get married? No. He is simply saying to this group of people that it is okay for someone to remain celibate, to remain single. This does not mean that it is bad to get married; it merely means celibacy is good. It is acceptable.

Why does Paul even need to address this? Well, the Jewish view, and remember there were Jewish Christians in the church at Corinth, was that a man who was not married had something wrong with him. In fact, Talmudic tradition held that if you were 25 years old and a man, and you were not married, you were accursed. Something clearly was wrong. According to the Jewish leaders, there were seven kinds of people who could not get into heaven. The first was a man who had no wife, and the second was a woman who had no children.

Now, why did they believe that? They went back to Genesis 1:28, the first command of Scripture: "Be fruitful and multiply." They said that if God has commanded us to be fruitful and multiply and we do not do that, we are breaking His first and greatest commandment in their view.

However, Paul establishes that singleness is not a bad thing. He says that singleness, celibacy, is good. It is not bad. It is not better. There were certain Greeks in the church at Corinth who were saying that it was better, while the Jews were saying it was wicked. The Greeks were asserting that it was more spiritual.

You see, the church at Corinth had some divisions. There were people in the church who were looking at married couples and saying, "Pity." But it is not bad, it is not better, and it is not more spiritual. It is acceptable; it is even honorable.

In verse 2, if you are taking notes, celibacy is tempting. Celibacy, as stated in verse 1, is good, but celibacy is tempting. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife and let every woman have her own husband.

I mentioned just a moment ago that women in that culture were often devalued. They were seen as having fewer rights than men. Yet, notice the teaching of the Scriptures. Notice God's heart.

Men and women are equal. Let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. There is an equality that comes with the gospel that is found in no other society apart from the gospel.

Now, the problem is that in our society, we took that equality established by the gospel and stretched it to a place that God never intended. In the 1820s, when the free love movement began, along with what was called the women's liberation movement that continues to this day, their view was that marriage brings women into bondage and that it was something established for men by men. Therefore, they sought to get rid of it, unhindered sex, and unhindered love from marriage and religion.

Clearly, God's Word establishes that men and women are equal. God created man; yes, He created man first. He recognized that man was alone, and it was not good for man to be alone. The garden was probably a total mess. So, what did God do? He caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and took from Adam's side. Now, we all say "rib," but the literal translation would be that He took from his side.

It has been said in many marriage ceremonies, and I have used it in some that I have conducted as well, that God did not take from Adam's feet so that he would be over a woman or lord over her with authority. He took from his side to create a bride, and they are equal in God's eyes. This is revolutionary for society and for sinful, fallen man.

Paul says, "Let every man have his own wife. Let every woman have her own husband." Why? He states here to avoid fornication. One might think, if they only looked at 1 Corinthians 7, that Paul only values marriage for the purpose of dealing with sexual immorality. That is not the case. His other teachings on marriage, most specifically in Ephesians chapter 5, make it very clear that Paul had a high value of marriage and the marital relationship, and so does the Bible.

However, in the context of Corinth, where there was a real issue of sexual immorality, he emphasizes in chapter 6, verse 18, to flee sexual immorality. He says that those who have sexual desires, which God created, should only engage in satisfying those desires in the context of marriage. Let every man have his own wife.

Celibacy is a good thing, but for most people, it would place them in a position of great temptation. Celibacy is not the norm. Therefore, if celibacy is going to cause an individual to sin sexually, then they should get married, as Paul's teaching suggests. As we'll see later on in 1 Corinthians 7, it's better to marry than to burn. Many of you know the verse because you applied it when you decided to get married.

Now, the single individual, especially, may ask, "Am I called to be married?" Many Christians come to that place when they're single and following the Lord, wondering if they are called to marriage. The reality is that most are. If you have a desire to be married and find that abstinence and celibacy are difficult, and you struggle with lust in that area, then it is likely that you are called to get married.

The next question that arises, particularly among college students and younger youth, is how to know who God is calling them to marry. This becomes the most important question, doesn't it? We often have a misconception that there is a special person that God created just for us somewhere, and we must divine who that is. We might think, "Oh, I think this might be them, but I don't know." I have met many Bible college students, especially at Calvary Chapel Bible College, who are consumed with anxiety and stress over whether they have found the right person.

There are some important principles to consider. You shouldn't ask the question or seek a spouse until you are old enough to get married. There is no special age where we can definitively say that once you reach this age, then you can or should get married. In our culture, the age keeps getting older and older. It is a subjective matter. At what point is a person ready and able to get married and support a spouse?

That being the case, in my opinion, if you are not old enough to get married—meaning you are not old enough to support a spouse—then you are not old enough to date or have a girlfriend or boyfriend. I know that there are many people in our culture who would disagree with this perspective.

Many of you who have younger kids in their teenage years may find that they really don't like the concept of not dating. They come home and say, "Yeah, but Sandy does, and Billy does." Well, I don't care. You're not old enough to get married, and you ought not to date. This is contrary to our culture, I recognize, but our culture is upside down. The reason for this is simple: you're putting yourself in a position of great temptation unnecessarily.

Now, imagine how different our society would be if we actually put this sort of principle in place. We would not have the amount of teenage pregnancies that we have, and we certainly would not have the problem of abortion that we face today. There are very simple blessings that come from obedience to the principles of Scripture.

In my opinion, if you're not interested in getting married, you should not date or have a girlfriend or boyfriend. If you're at a point where you just say, "I'm not interested in it right now," consider this: number one, it's not smart. You're likely going to fall into temptation and sin. Number two, it's not sincere. The person you're dating is likely considering marriage, and it is selfish and unfair to them to play with their heart and emotions.

If you're in a relationship today and you're not interested in getting married, listen, ladies: if you're dating a guy who is not interested in marriage, dump him. He's messing with you, plain and simple. He's not being godly.

Men, another principle we have to consider is that you should marry someone who is equally yoked to you. Based on 2 Corinthians 6:14, it says, "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers." The context of this verse is not specifically about marriage; it speaks about any sort of relationship, whether it be a working relationship or partnership. However, clearly, marriage falls under this principle.

Do not be unequally yoked with an unbeliever. Unequally yoked does not only mean that you should marry a person who is a believer, which is, of course, essential. It means that you should marry a person who is a strong believer and has the same vision and passion that you do.

Another principle to consider is that attraction, connection, and compatibility when considering a spouse should come from all three aspects.

Levels of our being are important to consider. I told you last week that man is a trichotomy, having body, soul, and spirit. When we are considering whom we are going to marry, there should be attraction, compatibility, and connection at the body level. It is normally the physical attraction that starts first. That's not necessarily a bad thing; you probably should not marry someone that you are not attracted to, as it is going to cause problems. Physical attraction is an important aspect. God did create that, and we must recognize that it cannot stop there. If it stops there, you have a real problem. Why? Well, physical things change.

A relationship built solely on physical attraction is problematic. It needs to have a connection at the soul level as well. A couple should have that soul connection. It may sound a little cliché to say, "We're soulmates," but what does that really mean? You do not need eHarmony to figure this out. The person you marry does not have to have identical likes and dislikes, but they should have similar ones. There should be a shared philosophy about how a family should run and how children should be raised. At the soul level, there should be a similar philosophy about life.

Therefore, if you want to be in ministry and the person you are interested in wants nothing to do with it, that should be a red flag. If you have had a heart's desire to be on the mission field your whole life and you meet someone wonderful who wants nothing to do with foreign missions, that is a danger sign. You have to consider these things.

Unfortunately, because of physical attraction and the emotional bonds that can be so tight, we can sometimes be less objective. We may need the help of outside people to point out important considerations. For example, if you want kids and the person you intend to marry hates children, that should also be a red flag. The soul connection is important, as are the body and spirit. This definitely falls into the category of being equally yoked. The person that you choose to marry should align with your values and beliefs.

To be at some point spiritually connected is essential in marriage. Of course, we know you don't marry an unbeliever. One of the biggest hindrances to unity in marriage is often different faith backgrounds, and sometimes even just denominational differences. When someone has a different opinion of theology, it can cause significant problems within the marriage. Therefore, you shouldn't just marry any believer; marry someone who has a similar passion and desire for God as you do.

We cannot be completely wooden and unemotional about the issues of marriage because there is emotion attached to it—God created it that way. However, we also should not set aside these objective issues. I can only imagine how different the church would be and how much less biblical marital counseling would be needed if we applied the scriptural truths found in the first seven verses of 1 Corinthians.

In 1 Corinthians 7, verse 2, Paul gives one reason for marriage: to flee from immorality. However, there are many biblical reasons why marriage is important. You might want to jot these down for future consideration and meditation.

Number one is procreation. In Genesis 1:28, God says to be fruitful and multiply, making procreation an important aspect of marriage. In Malachi chapter 2, God states that one of the purposes of marriage is to produce godly offspring.

Secondly, pleasure is a key aspect. God intended for pleasure to take place within the context of marriage; that is the place for sexual pleasure to be experienced—nowhere else.

Number three is provision. God wants man to provide what a woman needs, and conversely, He desires that a woman would make up for what is lacking in a man. It is cliché, but in one sense, the wife completes the husband, and the husband completes the wife.

Finally, partnership is crucial. The partnership aspect of marriage is important, and this is where being equally yoked comes into play. A yoke was a device that would bind two animals together for pulling a cart or plowing a field. It was constructed specifically for those animals to unite them so they could work as one team. Thus, the partnership within marriage is vital.

And then the picture that marriage is. God has created marriage to be a picture of what He desires in the oneness relationship with man.

Number six is for purity, as we see here in 1 Corinthians chapter 7, verse 2. To abstain from sexual immorality, God has given us a route within marriage. So, we have procreation, pleasure, provision, partnership, picture, and purity. We see celibacy being a good thing in verse 1, while celibacy is tempting in verse 2. In verses 3 through 5, celibacy is wrong for married people. Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence, and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife has not power over her own body, but the husband. Likewise, the husband has not power over his own body, but the wife. Defraud not one another, except it be with consent for a time that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer, and come together again that Satan not tempt you.

Again, we see the equality of man and wife in the marriage relationship here in verses 3 and 4. Let the husband render to the wife due benevolence. Let the wife render to the husband due benevolence. The wife has not power over her own body, and at that point, the women's liberation crowd in our nation jumps up and freaks out, and their heads almost explode. But they fail, because their heads are exploding, to read the rest of the verse. Likewise, the husband has not power over his own body, but the wife. Paul's primary implication here is that the husband and the wife are to yield themselves physically and emotionally to one another.

Celibacy is for singles. Sex is for marriage. The devil does everything he possibly can to get singles to have sex outside of marriage and to get married people to not have sex in marriage. Unfortunately, he is very good at it.

Due benevolence—what does this mean? Well, it does not only mean sex, but it does imply that. Due benevolence means due love. To offer to one another due love. Women are tempted by the enemy to withhold due benevolence physically from their husbands. But men, we must recognize that men are tempted to withhold due benevolence emotionally from their wives. Men's needs are more met physically.

Women are more met emotionally. Men need to recognize that it's harder to be emotionally available to their wives than it is physically. Similarly, women need to understand that it is more difficult for them to be physically available for their husbands than it is emotionally. However, it is our responsibility in marriage to seek to meet the other person's needs, not just our own. The relationship is not about a quid pro quo, where one says, "I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine." That is not the picture of love.

I can only imagine how much less the need would be for pastoral biblical counseling if we observed the exhortations we see in this passage. The exhortation that Paul gives here is in the present imperative tense in the Greek. What does that mean? It means Paul is saying this is a continual action. It is not just something you do as newlyweds; it is something you do throughout your entire marriage.

He states that the wife does not have power over her own body, and likewise, the husband does not have power over his body. What does that mean? The word "power" comes from the root word "exousia" in Greek, which means jurisdiction or authority. When we say "I do" and make vows in marriage, we are giving ourselves to our spouse and placing ourselves under their authority—both our physical bodies and our emotional lives. They hold a very strong position in this regard.

Paul does give one exception where there can be abstinence within marriage. He states in verse 5, "Defraud not one another, except it be with consent for a time that you may give yourselves to prayer." The word "fasting" may be a good translation, but there is some dispute about it. The key point is that the husband and wife must mutually agree if there is going to be a period of abstinence. Paul outlines four principles here: number one, there is to be a start; number two, there is to be a clear duration.

Number three, there's a specific focus, and number four, there's a very specific end. The husband and wife must mutually agree on this separation for celibacy. One cannot say, "I'm giving myself to the Lord right now," without the other's consent. There needs to be a mutual agreement, and within that agreement, there must be a set period of time for this abstinence. The phrase does not imply a long time, but rather an agreed-upon time—not indefinitely until one says so, but a specifically prescribed duration.

What is the focus? Paul states that abstinence in marriage is only for the purpose of prayer. The couple should not focus on the physical union for a time so that they may concentrate on the Lord. There must also be a clear end, at which point, as Paul says, the two come together again. If this clear end does not occur, it places the couple in real danger due to the desire for sexual intimacy outside of marriage. What was initially intended for spiritual benefit—stopping for a time to seek the Lord in prayer—can become a significant sinful problem.

Lastly, in this section, Paul says in verse 5, "Defraud not one another." Withholding physical or emotional intimacy from your spouse in marriage is seen by Paul as robbery. Why? Because you are not your own. When you married your spouse, you gave yourself to them. They have authority over you, and you have authority over them. To defraud them by withholding emotional or physical intimacy is indeed robbery.

The picture is clear. When we became Christians, we were not our own; we were redeemed and bought with a price by the Lord. Therefore, we rob God when we use ourselves for all the immorality of this world. The same principle applies in marriage. Celibacy is good, but it is tempting and not meant for married couples.

Number six, or number four, celibacy is a gift. In verses 6 and 7, Paul states that celibacy is a gift, but he speaks this by permission and not as a commandment. He expresses a desire that all men were even as he is, but every man has his proper gift from God.

One after this manner and another after that. I speak by permission, says Paul. He is careful to note that his words are given as an answer to a specific question from the Corinthian church and not as a command of Scripture. He is seeking to impart wisdom to them based on Scripture. He is teaching them.

The Jews in the Corinthian church would have no doubt had a hard time with this. The idea of singleness being a good thing grated at them culturally. But Paul says that marriage is not commanded; however, it is the norm. Most people get married, and as we look around this crowd this morning, most people are married. Even in our culture today, it is sometimes looked at less and less favorably, but it is often seen as strange that a person is not married as they advance in age. However, that is not always the case. Paul says that sometimes singleness is good.

Singleness is good when the individual who is single is not completely consumed with the desire to be married or overcome by lust. In any other case, he says, it is better to marry than to burn. Paul expresses that he would have men be as he is. Again, the context of who Paul was writing to is important here and what he is addressing.

Some believe that Paul had been married at some point in his life. They say that Paul was a part of the Sanhedrin, and to be a part of the Sanhedrin, that Jewish ruling body, one had to be married. However, there is no biblical evidence that says Paul was part of the Sanhedrin; it is just tradition. The reality is that he likely was not a part of the Sanhedrin. Given that his age was very close to the age of Jesus when Jesus was crucified, Paul was also in his 30s at that time and probably too young to be on the Sanhedrin.

He was, however, a disciple of a leading ruler on the Sanhedrin, Gamaliel. Some argue that Paul had to be married, but that is not necessarily true. He may have been married; he may not have been married. We do know for a fact that when Paul wrote this letter to the Corinthians, he was single. Some say that if he was married, his wife died, making him a widower. Others suggest that if he was married when he became a Christian, she divorced him. Both ideas could possibly be extrapolated from the passage.

Whatever conclusion one comes to, we know that when he wrote this, he was not married, and he saw that it was a benefit to him and a benefit to those in Corinth.

To remain single at that time, why? Well, the winds of persecution were beginning to stir. As we see in 1 Corinthians 7, verse 29, Paul believed the time was short. He states, "But I say, brethren, that time is short." So it remains that those who have wives should be as though they did not have them. Paul emphasizes that the time is short; the Lord could come back at any time, and persecution is stirring up. Therefore, his focus is on being engaged in the things of God.

However, he also says that if you're married, don't seek to be loosed from your wife. There was a teaching in Corinth suggesting that if you were married, you needed to divorce and be single as unto the Lord. Paul counters this by saying to remain in the position you are in and serve the Lord. He acknowledges that there are certain limitations and distractions for married couples that a single person does not have.

Every man, he says, has his proper gift: the proper gift to be married and serve his wife as unto the Lord, or the proper gift to be single and not be consumed by that singleness. If you are single, he advises dedicating your singleness to the Lord. Don't seek a wife, as we will see later on in 1 Corinthians 7, but seek the Lord. Seek first the kingdom of God, and all these things will be added unto you if that is your desire. Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.

We can become so consumed with this, especially when an individual is single, often at the right time. Most of the time, they are preoccupied with this during junior high and high school. If you go to camp with our high school, you know what I'm talking about. The scriptural teaching is clear: being single is not a bad thing, Paul says; it can be a good thing. There are certain benefits to it. Paul recognized those benefits because he himself was single and therefore unencumbered, able to travel and do the things he did in his ministry.

Every single one of you married couples here today knows that when you were single, there were certain advantages to being single. There was less responsibility and the opportunity to up and move at any time, to go anywhere. Some of those freedoms are gone when you're married. However, what a privilege, honor, and blessing it is to serve the Lord in marriage, to serve your wife or husband as unto the Lord, and to raise godly offspring, which God has called us to. Clearly, marriage is essential; not everyone could be single, or else we would have a problem.

Celibacy is good, but it is clearly tempting. For the person who is in a place of singleness right now, if the desire is to be married, set your focus upon the Lord. Seek not a wife, and when the time comes, He'll bring that into your life.

I love what John Corson says about Genesis chapter 2, when God caused all the animals to pass before Adam. Adam saw that there were two: a lion and a lioness. As he went down the line, he realized, "Oh wow, there are two of them," but he found not a helper meet for him. If Adam had gone out and tried to find someone comparable to him, he would have ended up with a big hairy ape. But instead, God had him go to sleep and brought his bride.

By the power of the Holy Spirit working in your life, you can set your focus upon the Lord and bring your singleness to Him, living unencumbered. However, being single can be tempting. Therefore, 1 Corinthians 6:18 is extremely important: flee sexual immorality. Don't hang around with it. If you're in that position and not ready to get married, it's not a time to date. You will fall into sin, whether in the mind or physically.

If you're married, do not withhold from your spouse. Men, do not withhold emotional intimacy from your wives. Women, do not withhold physical intimacy from your husbands. As we see, both celibacy and marriage are gifts. Marriage is a gift; he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. To be celibate, as Paul says, is also a gift. Offer that gift back to the Lord to honor and glorify Him.

What an amazing witness it would be to our culture if the church lived the Scriptures! However, we all know the statistics are very sad: the divorce rate among Christians is equally as high as that within the world. That has to change. I was so brokenhearted when the Prop 8 issue was happening, hearing certain groups against Prop 8 say, "Well, they've done such a bad job with marriage; we could do better." That should hit us to the heart.

Because in some way, we have to admit we've done a bad job of exemplifying what God has called us to. May we regain the upper hand and show our society the very picture that God intended: that marriage would be a mutually serving relationship of united individuals in Christ. Amen?

Let's stand and pray. Father, Your Word is living and powerful, and certainly it cuts us to the heart. But, Lord, sometimes we need certain things cut out of our lives. We thank You that You are delicate in wielding the sword. Help us, Lord, to also be delicate when we use Your Word and share it with others.

God, would You speak to us in just the stillness of our hearts as we go from here today? If in any way we've been failing in the principles that we see here in 1 Corinthians 7, God, would You work by Your Spirit to first convict us and then, Lord, sanctify and cleanse us as You so wonderfully do by the washing of the water of Your Word? May that cleansing continue as we go from here today.

Would You shine brightly through Your church, Lord, as a bride without spot or blemish? For we ask it in Jesus' name. Amen.